We know the honeymoon period doesn’t last forever. It’s harsh, but it’s true, but there are definitely some things you can do to keep that excitement and joy alive in your marriage.
In this blog we’ll discuss what you can do to keep your marriage alive, as well as what to do in an argument; helping you nurture a strong, healthy relationship Inshallah.
Let’s start by talking about the fun stuff...how to keep the romance alive:
During the honeymoon phase, you’re so in love with your partner and are impressed with pretty much anything they do. You're excited by them and appreciate them. Don’t let that die with the marriage.
Try to instill a routine where you show the other person you appreciate them and are grateful for them. Maybe once a month write each other a letter saying all the things you love about each other, or even a list of 5 things you appreciate about each other (I know it sounds cheesy, but these things really do help in showing that you are still grateful for one another!)
If you’re not into writing and are more of a gestures person, how about making your spouse breakfast in bed? Or taking them somewhere you know they love? It really is the smallest things that count.
The honeymoon phase is exciting because it’s new and everything is filled with “first times”. But those don’t have to end after marriage, you can keep trying so many new, different activities, like skiing, snorkelling, travelling, even a new cafe or restaurant! The world is your oyster, continue creating new exciting memories, and try different experiences you can bond over.
What’s a staycation? I hear you wonder… Well, a staycation is simply taking a holiday in your own home country. Explore those areas you’ve never seen before, because can you really say you’ve seen everything your country has to offer? There are always hidden gems to be discovered, and some times, these can be even better than travelling to different countries! It’s a brilliant way to have a little escape from the mundane everyday, and bring back that sizzle to your relationship.
Now I’m not saying go all out and book a whole holiday abroad, but the little unexpected surprises can mean a lot, coming back from work and see a florist on your way? Why not buy her some flowers to make her day?
See something you know your husband has wanted for a while but hasn’t yet bought it? Treat him to it, surprise him. Surprises are exciting, and are definitely the perfect way to keep your relationship feeling fresh and fun.
Buying each other gifts isn’t the be all and end all, it’s more to do with taking your partner’s likes into consideration, and wanting to make them happy.
Now, on to the more serious and important part of maintaining a healthy relationship: How to overcome conflicts...
Respect for your spouse is one of the most important foundations a marriage is built upon. Infact, marriage satisfaction has been found to be influenced largely by the respect partners show for each other. Always treat your spouse with respect and admiration. As discussed before, show them that you are grateful for them!
Seems obvious right? It is, and yet it’s something that can always be taken for granted or overlooked. You need to communicate clearly with your partner, if you’ve just fought...maybe take a little break before coming back to communicate what you felt they did wrong, hopefully from there you can work towards fixing things.
Writing to each other is a different form of communication, it may prevent you saying something you would regret as you have to think about what you write rather than blurting everything from your mouth. Write what you feel and let your partner read it over, it could be a great way to express yourselves and solve your problems.
Emotional Intelligence (EI) is the ability to identify and label your own emotions, as well as the emotions of others. It has a super important role in the strength of your relationship. Being more understanding of each other can definitely help you avoid conflict and get through any issue a lot easier.
It can be hard finding the time to simply be together. Work, children, family, and other responsibilities all place demands on our time. Spouses often forget to schedule time just for each other. It doesn’t have to be elaborate and expensive; it can be as simple as getting an ice-cream together. What is important is to set aside some time to reconnect with your spouse.
Yes you are a couple, but that doesn’t mean you need to spend every minute together and tell each other every single thing. You can have your boundaries as long as they are healthy. Although marriage is the unification of two souls - there is no doubt that some aspects of our lives require autonomy. Such as our sense of self, life goals, passions, personal growth plans. These aspects of our life can coexist in our marriage- but they should never have to be compromised.