10 Red Flags that a Muslim Player Won’t Marry You

Sarah officially started her professional career by working in a small news agency in her city. As a fresh graduate she was profoundly happy about her new job. She felt as if her four years of hard work had finally started to pay off. Throughout her time at University she looked at couples roaming around and taking care of each other. However, she had also witnessed some painful ‘break-ups’ and detachments. – the reason Sarah never believed in love before marriage.

At her office her thinking started to change a little as she genuinely began to develop feelings for her boss. She felt as if he too liked her in the sincere sense. They became good friends and occasionally went for lunch together. The boss told Sarah that he will marry her after 3 years. Over a brief period of 15 days her affiliation grew stronger. However, something irked her and that was his demand for physical contact. After a few pecks and hugs he apologized that he can’t convince his family for the marriage. Both of them agreed on remaining friendly colleagues, but even as professional friends the boss tried to provoke her for an illegal relation by requesting Sarah to meet at a private and secure place. This was an eye-opener for her and she realized that someone truly in love with her would never provoke her for such things. She knew that she had fallen for the wrong person. Although she used to cry a lot and the detachment has left her emotionally traumatized, but Sarah implored Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) for His mercy and forgiveness. There was no one in her life to share this pain with. Bismillah!!

“My Lord! Increase me in knowledge.”

Dear Sisters in Islam, Sarah is not the only girl who has experienced this. Many girls have gone through even bitter experiences that have left them emotionally shattered. There are so many sisters who get trapped in this emotional abuse and regret afterwards, even while knowing that these attachments can be painful if not bound legally (i.e through Nikkah) girls still get caught up. The aim of this article is to share with you the 10 red flags which can tell you that a Muslim player won’t marry you and there is no point of indulging in activities that will lead you to nowhere in life.

1.He feels uncomfortable when you talk about marriage
Whenever you try to discuss with him the future of your marriage with him, he tries to change the topic and gets irritated. He also asks you to think about it when the time will come. He is more interested in planning out dates and enjoying secretively.

2. He doesn’t talk to your Wali
He insists on keeping the relationship as secret as possible. Claiming that he loves you with all his heart and wants the best for you in life, he still doesn’t talk to your Wali (father/guardian) about the possibility that he will take your responsibility in the future.

3. He hides your relationship with him
A Muslim man who truly loves you would never keep you like a filthy hidden part of his life that doesn’t deserved to be shown to the world. He doesn’t want to declare the relationship openly. If he hides you from his family and is afraid to confess his inclination towards you then understand that he doesn’t plan to marry you.

4. He asks for your photographs without proper hijab
Any man who would know that you will be his future wife would never asks you to stoop down to unethical levels. Every man dreams of a modest and chaste girl, how can he push his future life partner to embrace immodesty? Think about it!
Anybody, encouraging you with ‘haram’ can never be your well-wisher in life, let alone being a lover. If he is demanding under-dressed photographs then bear this in mind ‘he will never marry you’, no matter how tall his claims are. You will be a temporary temptation of his life. Every man wants his wife to act with a certain level of dignity, if you don’t belong to him, you definitely do belong to someone else, do not harm your dignity out of stupidity.

5. He doesn’t care for your pain and worries
You are spending nights crying for him and hoping to hear just a few comforting words from him, but he is least bothered. This speaks volumes about his indifference towards you. A person who wishes to make you his spouse will own your pains and worries and have an empathetic approach.

6. Everything depends on his convenience
He talks when he wants to and ignores you for the rest of the time. This explains that you are just a leisure sport in his life. When he is too bored he decides to spend time with you.

7. With words
Genuine words aren’t hard to identify. He hasn’t even discussed the size of the wedding ring or told you about the dress he wants you to wear on Nikkah day – still you expect him to marry you – don’t get trapped!

8. Friends with Benefits
Some men use the word ‘friends’ to keep the relation going so that girls remain hooked up and they can enjoy their company. If he uses all chances to take advantage of you and even if it involves paying the bill at lunch then this is yet another red flag for you.

9. Doesn’t trust you with his secrets
If he is reluctant in discussing his past and doesn’t open up to you then believe it, you are not worthy enough. Had he been serious about including you in his life, he would’ve shared every single detail about himself. Not necessarily his past sins. But things that matter and life choices and incidences that are of importance.

10 Finally! When your ‘NO’ to his demands distance him from you
This is the final red flag and an evident one indeed. When you refuse to meet him alone or to fulfil his obscene demands, he would start distancing himself from you, just like a useless paper in his wallet.

Dear Sisters, falling in love the halal way is not wrong. Islam itself is a religion of love and compassion. You do have a right to decide who your future life partner will be, but getting involved in pre-marital physical bonding/infatuation will only lead to affliction. So maintain your chastity for the one who deserves you the most and promises to be your guardian for the rest of his life. As it is mentioned in the Holy Quran:

“Certainly will the believers have succeeded: They who are during their prayer humbly submissive. And they who turn away from ill speech. And they who are observant of Zakah. And they who guard their private parts. Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they will not be blamed. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors”.{Surah Al Muminun 23 : Verses 1-7}

Moreover, it is never too late to repent and retreat, if you have gone through this make sincere ‘Taubah’ and wait for the right man to hold your hand after signing the Nikkah papers ofcourse.

May Allah bless you all with righteous spouses who will be the means of you entering Jannatul Firdous al Alaa.

Source: http://www.theidealmuslimah.com/2015/06/22/10-red-flags-that-a-muslim-player-wont-marry-you/

20 days ago

Get married, free, on muzmatch.

South African Match! #muzmatchsuccess

My name is Halima and I'm from Gauteng, South Africa and my husband (Arshad) is from Kwa-Zulu Natal, South Africa; we are both South African Indians.

He liked my profile on muzmatch on the 8th of April 2018 and on the 9th we started chatting and Alhamdulillah, today we are husband and wife.

We did our Nikah last month (March 9th 2019).

About a month before I joined muzmatch I remember speaking to my mother in the kitchen as we cooked supper and she had full confidence that I'd be getting married soon.

I told her that I felt that maybe I'm just not meant to get married and be happy, taking into consideration that I personally felt like one could never find a decent man whose intention is to make Nikah in this day and age.

My Moulana had recommended that I join Nikah/Muslim match-making groups and muzmatch populated amongst my searches, so I downloaded the app and registered. After a while I had lost hope so I deleted the app from my phone but did not deactivate my profile.

It was a Monday morning, I had woken up to get ready for work,

I checked my phone and I had an email notification from muzmatch which read "Arshad likes you".

I was quite surprised; I looked at his profile and his biography was quite captivating but it seemed so surreal - this was too good to be true.

Wintery iPhone Flat Lay Mock Up
Photo by Emma Matthews / Unsplash

I used the link in his bio to view his Facebook profile, we had a mutual friend which was my cousin that also resides in Kwa-Zulu Natal, so I felt a bit more assured that this is definitely real considering that I had started to think that this could potentially be a catfish.

We started chatting that very morning and there was an instant click. It felt like we were long lost friends because of how well we understood each other and could complete each others sentences. We had the same interests and the same intention; we could speak for hours on end without running out of things to say.

We had realized that we are most definitely soulmates.

Within 2 weeks he called my parents to ask for my hand in marriage. In July 2018 (21st), I booked a flight to visit him and his mum for the day and after spending time together we knew that this was the right decision and that Allah SWT had created us for each other.

Photo by Ross Parmly / Unsplash

We then saw each other once again in August 2018 (25th - A surprise for my 21st birthday planned by him and my mum); and again in November 2018 when he flew up to attend my younger sister's wedding with his mum, younger sister and brother-in-law.

Slowly the long distance had become difficult, our younger sisters were both already married and settled and we started wondering when would we actually get married. In February this year he decided to relocate to Gauteng and found a temporary job.

His dad visited my parents and they decided to set a Nikah date, Alhamdulillah once the date was set everything fell into place by the will of Allah. He found a job as a PC Engineering lecturer and we were able to find our own place with our parents help and support.

Today I am happily married, living my dream with my husband and I have wonderful in-laws that love me as much as they love Arshad.

The most important quality I wanted in a husband was someone that could take my family as his own and Alhamdulillah I found that in Arshad.

We are now a huge happy family Alhamdulillah.

Jazak'Allah muzmatch! Arshad has found me due to the creation of this wonderful app (He always says that he found me, not the other way around).

I would advise everyone to put their trust and faith in Allah SWT, never give up hope that Allah SWT will send the one who is meant for you when the time is right - for Allah is the greatest of planners. May all the other individuals find their spouses through this app as well Insha'Allah.

Halima & Arshad

2 days ago

Egyptian Romance #muzmatchsuccess

My name is Yasmeen and I found my husband, Taymoor, on muzmatch on the last day of last ramadan. We were both divorced.

The first time we talked on muzmatch was in June and we got married one month later in August 2018. I always wanted to send our story to inspire others who are searching for a good husband and wife.  

We are both Egyptians, from Cairo, we even work & live very near to each others in New Cairo city. I am a digital marketing manager and Taymoor is an IT manager. I am 37 years old and he is 40.  

Influences of the past —
Stories, desire and a vivid imagination
attract people to this place.
Photo by Simon Matzinger / Unsplash

I have a daughter who is 12 years old, and I was searching for a real Muslim man who would be a good husband and father. Finally I found Taymoor, who is a good man and a good Muslim, he is very kind.

I am telling my friends that I found someone who really looks like me from the inside.  He was divorced and also has a kid, who is 5 years old. When we first chatted on muzmatch we spoke for over 6 hours, he was surprised much we got on, he even thought that this was a prank!

I couldn't believe that I finally found the man I was looking for. The first time we met, was after Eid al futr, in the House of Cocoa, as Taymoor knew that I loved chocolate. We talked about ourselves for over six hours, I did not want to leave and neither did he.

After we met I told my family and friends, and he did too. He and his family visited us and we got married in only two months, I never imagined that I would find my soulmate and marry him that fast.

I always wanted to find a man to trust and love, after being a single mom for years, I found out that my dream man was hard to find, but alhamdullah I found him on your app.  

Alhamdullah, we are very happy together, my daughter lives with us and his son visits us on the weekends. You cannot imagine how much I am now recommending muzmatch to all my friends.

It didn't even take me long to find my husband. I used the app for almost one month or less.

I am so happy alhamdullah now that I married a real muslim I always wanted.  

2 days ago

Get married, free, on muzmatch.

Close Call #muzmatchsuccess

My name is Sara and I just wanted to thank muzmatch and let you know that I finally got engaged on 24th December 2018 and found my Fiance - Ghazunfar on the App.  

We are really happy Alhamdulilah and just wanted to thank you for creating a platform for Muslims to find a suitable match for marriage!    

I believe it's a real blessing because initially we matched but we didn't talk as he hadn't read my messages and was not appearing online. After around 4 weeks, I unmatched however after some weeks I logged in and I came across his profile again. After some giving it some thought I decided to rematch and give it a try again.

The next day he replied to me and the is history.  Its been a almost a year since we matched on Muzmatch and we have set the Nikkah date which will be 1st March 2019 in Rawalpindi, Pakistan.  

Our families are very happy and we are looking forward to entering into the blessed union of marriage Insha'Allah. We just wanted to say keep up the good work, may Allah bless you and request that you keep us in prayers.  

One last thing to everyone using the  muzmatch App - please do not give up, there is someone out there for us all!  

2 days ago

Get married, free, on muzmatch.



© 2019 muzmatch Inc.